carry on

So we do not lose heart. Even though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day.

                     2 Corinthians 4:16

__________________________________

 

we carry this pain with us

this pain that comes from bodies aging

this pain that comes from illness

this pain that comes from injury

 

we carry this pain with us

this pain that comes from injustice

from greed and the machinations of the power

 

we carry this pain with as

as words of hate and fear and bigotry

flow into our heads and hearts

 

as we watch and listen

to people who have closed their minds and hearts

accept lies as truth

and call evil good, and good evil

 

we carry this pain with us

as we watch another black son, father, brother, husband friend

gunned down

as we watch people choose guns over children

blindly stumbling down the way of domination and intimidation

as if is the way

 

we carry the pain of knowing that perhaps our pain

is nothing compared to the pain of others

systematically oppressed

systematically minimized

systematically controlled and intimidate

 

knowing that no matter how much pain

may reside in our own body

our own heart

 

there are those whose pain is beyond

our understanding

 

I cannot understand the pain of a black mother

the pain of a woman assaulted or minimized

the pain of the poor, the disenfranchised

 

we try so hard to deal with the pain

we medicate

we legislate

we manipulate

 

and yet the pain remains

woven into our bones

and into the fabric of our heart

 

on this morning

as I carry my own pain

as my body hurts when I move

and hurts when I don’t move

 

as my heart hurts

from the hate and fear

from the racism I see

 

as my mind aches

assaulted by those who would justify that which cannot be justified

by the worship of guns

by the overwhelming power of toxic individuality

by this world

this mess

 

I know that only the Flame of the Spirit

only the Divine Wind

can renew me

 

I need the inner fire

to scorch me

the inner wind

to move me

 

the world around me will always be painful

(until the Kingdom comes)

the pain will always be present

 

I will always carry it

it is unavoidable

it is the human experience

 

but I can be renewed

day by day

dying to be born

giving to receive

hoping against hope

 

walking with pain

but walking with hope

carrying not just pain

but carrying too a Love that will not let me go

 

 

search me

Search me, O God, and know my heart;

    test me and know my thoughts.

See if there is any wicked way in me,

    and lead me in the way everlasting.

                     Psalm 139

________________________________________

 

there is no escaping it

Sacred is not up there, out there

what we call God is not some sort of anthropomorphic being

who is fixed in one place at one time

 

is not One who “lives” in heaven

 

no, that Power, that Love, that Voice

that we try so hard to define in so many ways

Father

Mother

Song

Spirit

Trinity

 

Aaack!!

 

is all around us

it is everywhere we go

but more, it is in us

 

which is why the Psalmist cries

“Where can I go from your spirit?

Or where can I flee from your presence?

If I ascend to heaven, you are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.

If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea,

even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast. (vv 7-10)

 

that is scary and comforting at one and the same time

it is scary to be that close, to be known that well

it is comforting to be so filled and embraced by Love

 

sometimes I wonder how it is for the Beloved to watch

what goes on inside our hearts and heads

 

what is it like for love to exist next to so much hate (I cannot use a softer word)

what is like for compassion to live next to such anger

for forgiveness to live next to such resentment

for generosity to live next to such greed

and for humility to live next to such pride?

 

what is it like for Sacred Presence to look out through out

eyes, and see what love sees

while understanding what we see (which may not be the same thing at all, at all)

 

what is it like for Sacred when they see

who flows out of our fingers as we post an comment on Facebook or Twitter?

 

I cannot help but return after such musings

to the closing plea of the Psalmist

who I suspect, in his/her own way, must have had similar thoughts

 

Search me, O God, and know my heart;

    test me and know my thoughts.

See if there is any wicked way in me,

    and lead me in the way everlasting.

 

O power that created and sustains the universe

O power that is love

O Sacred Presence, Spirit, Child, Parent

that fills me and defines me

 

be in my thinking

be in my feeling

be in my seeing

 

be in me so completely

that you own my heart

transform my thoughts

and guide my actions

 

help me so that today

my life reflects the presence of Love

When your tears become mine

Until you can see

My tears are also your tears

Prayers are empty

                     Gina Belton (Connosoisseurs of Suffering)

______________________________

 

another day

another black child dead

 

another day

another school shooting

 

another day

full of news of voter suppression

 

another day

another diagnosis of cancer

 

another day

full of tears

 

black mothers and fathers crying

over the futility of it all

crying because every day

every day

the news comes again of a child gone

 

white mothers, brown mothers,

mothers of all colors

crying over the fear that

as they send their child off to school,

they may never see them again

 

people crying because people filled with

fear and bias, greed and power lust

would deny them their right to vote

to have a voice

to be

 

the tears flow

like a never ending stream

 

and then the words come

“you have my thoughts and prayers”

 

but nothing changes

just another day

another shooting

another act of injustice

another act of oppression

 

nothing will change

until we finally understand

that the black boy lying in his own blood

on a Minnesota street

is our brother

our child

 

nothing will change until the tears of his mother

become our tears

 

we often hear it said

“they will not take it seriously, until it happens to them”

“it will not become real until it ‘hits home’”

 

indeed

until we understand

that each person out there

is a child of God

that each person out there is

a brother or sister

 

until we realize that what happens

to another

happens to a member of our family

 

nothing will change

 

may the tears come

may they come when we hear of another child dead

another person made homeless

another person refused healthcare

another person hungry

another person afraid

another person blocked from voting

 

may the tears come

like a flood

and may our prayers ride

our tears

 

to God

Values

I believe in values

 

if I don’t know what I value,

I won’t know how to live

 

what we value reveals what we believe is important

and if we live toward our values

which we almost unconsciously do

 

then our values shape

our thoughts, our perceptions of the world

and ultimately our actions

 

our values shape our lives

our lives reveal what our real values are

 

most of us have core values

which are woven into our being from the moment we are born

 

our parents shape our values

so do cultures

teachers

organizations

friends

and even perhaps enemies

 

over the years these values become part of our fabric

they are who we are

 

core values can be positive

my parents, I believe, tried to install in me a set of values

those values were installed in them by their parents

 

I am part of an extended family that has received clear legacy

from Peter Albert Kliewer and Katherine Braun Kliewer

they taught their children, my parents, and my aunts and uncles

that it is important to be aware of the Sacred

 

for them as Mennonites the Sacred was clearly defined as the Biblical God

 

they taught their children that you should be honest

and that you should serve your community

that family was important

and that taking care of the planet is important

 

they taught their children that one should be a person of peace

and that violence is not retributive

 

my parents and my aunts and uncles picked all of this up

and passed it on, imperfectly at times

altered at times

inconsistently at times

 

but still it is there

 

love God

love other people

love yourself

 

take care of others

take care of yourselves

and do not get sucked into the vortex of hate and violence

 

this perhaps is revealed I how many members of my family

the other Kliewers, the Larsons, the Templins, the Kielsmeiers

are doctors, or nurses,

teachers, or ministers

 

how many have worked in “service” jobs, with one main goal

serving others

helping others

lifting others up

 

and I realized that this heritage, these deeply ingrained values

is why I will never understand those

whose value in dominance

power

 

why I will never understand those who want to gain power

not to help and serve

but to dominate and accumulate

 

what a difference it makes if your value is dominance

rather than service

 

it changes how you see your job

your role within in organization

it changes how you see people

it changes who you treat people

 

with dominance one works to have power and make money

with service one works to provide a service

 

with dominance one wants to be over people,

to be in charge, to have the power

with service one wants to work with people so the entire

organization and everyone in that organization do well

 

with dominance people are objects to be used

with service people are precious souls to be loved

 

with dominance one seeks to climb over others to the top

and the ends justify the means

with service one seeks to help everyone succeed, how one

accomplishes one’s task matters

 

I keep thinking about the great issues of our day

Guns (especially guns)

Policing

Voting rights

Healthcare

Honesty in the media

 

we are at our worst, on all these issues

when we see them through the lenses of dominance

rather than the lenses of service

 

for me, as one who seeks to follow Jesus

there is not option here

I must seek to walk the path of servanthood

(however imperfectly I must do that)

 

I hear people say

I’m the boss, I make the rules.

I am going to carry whatever gun I want, wherever I want

(no matter how many times, when people do that, people die)

 

I hear people say

It is important MY party wins, not matter what it takes to win

(vote suppression perhaps?)

It is important that my race, religion, ideology, whatever!!!!

dominate

 

I hear Paul say

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ,

if any comfort from his love,

if any common sharing in the Spirit,

if any tenderness and compassion,

then make my joy complete by being like-minded,

having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.

Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,

not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

 

In short, be like Jesus

Who, being in very nature[a] God,

    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;

rather, he made himself nothing

    by taking the very nature[b] of a servant,

    being made in human likeness.

And being found in appearance as a man,

    he humbled himself

    by becoming obedient to death—

        even death on a cross!

 

Dominance or servanthood

which pathway

do our values reveal?

leaking grace

 

When you looked at me

your eyes imprinted your grace in me;

for this you loved me ardently;

and thus my eyes deserved

to adore what they beheld in you. . . .

Let us go forth to behold ourselves in your beauty.

                     John of the Cross, “The Spiritual Canticle,” stanzas 32, 36

__________________________________

 

what is grace

other than the Beloved

looking on us with eyes of love?

 

What is grace

other than the Beloved

loving us so deeply that we are given Love

permeated with the Sacred

 

the Beloved giving us a piece of

the Sacred

call it Spirit

call it love

a piece of himself/herself

 

so that we participate

in all that is peace

all that is hope

all that is joy

all that is love

 

and thus connected

an so filled

we are reconciled and transformed

 

new creations!

Sacred children

 

what is grace

other than we children of grace

flawed vessels that we are

cracked pots

 

leaking grace

 

looking on others the way the Beloved looks at us?

seeing in them not just a little piece of the divine

but also a little piece of ourselves

 

for we all participate

that “single, bigger Gazing and Loving”

(Richard Rohr, Daily Meditations, 4/11/21)

 

that some call God

 

we all are joined together

by the bond of Sacred Presence

that inner dwelling

 

so that Sacred is in me

and Sacred is in you

and thus I am part of you

and you are part of me

 

what is grace

other than realizing we all participate

in the same love

unearned and freely giving

 

all participate in the same

acceptance

 

the same welcome

 

that we are indeed One in the Spirit

and that we have no other choice

but to love our neighbor

 

no matter who that neighbor is

no matter what that neighbor has done

no matter their color, culture

creed, sexual orientation

or ideology

 

we have no choice

but to love them as ourselves

passing on

humbly, through (in many cases) our weakness

 

(remember, grace is most often leaked)

 

the acceptance and welcome

we have received

 

___________________________________

 

It only takes a spark

To get a fire going

And soon all those around

Can warm up in its glowing

That's how it is with God's love

Once you've experienced it

You spread that love to ev'ryone

You want to pass it on

 

After easter

it was the week after

Jesus was gone

risen

yes

but

 

but too much was the same

the same

the same

or worse

 

there was no jubilation

only fear

he had promised not to leave them alone

but they felt

so alone

abandoned

 

Jesus was risen

but

 

and so they sat

and waited

and waiting

 

ah yes, it would come

like wind and fire

that moment when the advocate would come

 

it would come

that moment when they would be blown

tumbling and stumbling

out of that darkened and sour room

rank with the smell of disappointment

 

but not yet

 

how often are we in that liminal place

that dead space

where it is too painful to look back

and to frightening to look ahead

 

how often do we wait

and wait

for what is next

 

there are it seems, moments

when all that is left is trust

when all we have

is our belief

however faltering it might be for the moment

 

that we are Love

and that Love will come

and there will be

something next

something new

 

all those hungry ghosts

fear, and hate

illness and death

 

they hover

but

 

we believe

that wind and fire will come

and scattered them

and lift us

 

we believe evil will be conquered

we believe love will win

 

and we wait

commodity thinking

…we have developed a materialistic culture that treats the earth as a commodity that exists to serve our own selfish purposes.

                     Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee, Prayer of the Heart

__________________

 

everything

if we take the Bible seriously

is Sacred

 

everything

participates in the divine

 

the earth which is God’s self revelation

an incarnation

if holy

 

so to0 the creatures that live upon it

and so too we human creatures

 

unique permeated with the sacred

little incarnations

 

how dare we treat the earth as a commodity

as something soulless,

an object merely to be used for our benefit

 

how dare we any human being this way?

and yet we do

 

we rape and pillage the earth

 

and people too

 

how many people are treated as commodities

women (for example) objectified by men

objects to be used

for sexual pleasure

as brood mares

as servants

 

how many men too

are used

 

no one, I expect is exempt

bosses objectify workers

churches objectify ministers

parents objectify children

consumers objectify retail workers

 

we walk through life using others

making them less than

making them

commodities

 

the more we objectify

the more we use

the more we objectify

the more we abuse

 

everything becomes about us

about our wealth

our power

our guns

our political ideology

 

it no longer matters what happens to others

 

this it seems is the great sin of humanity

it is seen in the “big lie”

it is seen in voter suppression

it is seen in the assaults of women’s rights

it is seen in the treatment of all who are vulnerable

it is seen in climate change denial

it is seen in those who refuse to wear masks

 

it is seen in those who do deplorable things

because

frankly they cannot see that the creation they are destroying

is permeated with God

and that the person they would ignore, or endager

is a Sacred Child

 

it is seen in my own life, in too many ways

perhaps, dare I say it, it is seen in yours?

 

what can I do today to connect myself with all that is sacred

with all that is

with the earth, its creatures

with the people who surround me

 

I sit, on my way to help another, in an airport

vaccinated, masked and distanced

 

I watch the people wander to and fro

some rushing, some moving slowly

some full of energy

some sagging, as if they are carrying the weight of the world

on their shoulders

 

it is easy to simply ignore

feeling on a spark of love and interest for the service dog

who pants at his person’s feet

 

can I see that person without a mask as homo divinus

how can I

sense a connection

with all of these scurrying people

 

nameless, faceless, rushing, limping,wandering

 

headed on vacation

headed on a work trip

headed toward a dying parent or friend

headed to a medical center for treatment

headed to family

 

how can I see God in the son the shines through the window?

how can I see the invisible bonds

that bind us all together?

 

perhaps I only need to be aware of my own spiritual nature

of the God within me

 

for if the Sacred is me

certainly the Sacred is in them

and certainly in earth beneath

and the sky above

 

it is disturbing

to be so connected, so aware

 

but only when I am no longer alone

isolated

only when I am part of this whole

can I really be me

and allow you to be you

 

 

 

Just Wait

Wait,

and see what comes

to fill

the gaping hole

in your chest.

Wait with your hands open

to receive what could never come

except to what is empty

and hollow

                     Jan Richardson, Circle of Grace, “Stay”, Wanton Gospeller Press

__________________________________

 

the day after Easter

must have been a disappointment

 

true, the tomb was empty

and there were the psychotic imaginings of the women

(how dare they)

 

but it was just another day

without Jesus

 

many of those who had followed

in the dusty of wake of Jesus

had simply returned to life as usual

a little sad

 

but what can one do with systematic oppression

except keep one’s head down

and try to stay out of trouble?

 

some had run, back to the Sea of Galilee

back to their nets and the stink of fish

 

some were huddled in an upper room

lurking in a darkness that reflected the

darkness in their souls

 

all of them

were hollowed out people

going through the motions

with tattered souls

and broken hearts

 

waiting

watching

hoping

 

still

that what seemed so crazy and impossible

was actually true

 

waiting for him to show up

waiting for something to show up

to fill that gaping hole

to stop the ache

 

little did they know

what lay ahead

that rushing wind, those tongues of fire

that blessing

 

that would fill them to overflowing

 

ah, those times of waiting

when we too wander the streets unseeing

our hearts void and empty

 

ah those times of waiting

as we go through the motions

simply doing what we have always done

because it seems as if there is no option

 

ah those time of waiting

when we hide

hoping it will all just go away

 

have hope precious souls

little do we know

what lies ahead!

 

Just wait

death and resurrection

“The Christian faith… is really about death and resurrection

It’s about how God continues to reach into the graves we dig for ourselves

And pulls us out, giving us new life, in ways both dramatic and small.”

______________________________________

 

There they were in the garden

the tomb was empty

fear gripped them all

 

Jesus’ body was gone

Simply gone

nothing left but burial rags

 

belief was mixed with unbelief

bewildered most left

unable to bear the moment

 

but Mary stayed

and wept, and wondered

 

until a man appears

a gardener, from the looks of things

frantic words tumble from her mouth

 

if you know where the body is, tell me

I cannot abide

I cannot abide it being taken away

Unloved

 

and then a voice she knows

Mary

Mary

 

and her eyes are open!

Teacher!

 

She rushes toward him

arms open

no fist bump

not handshake for her

 

she wants to feel him in her arms

feel his heart beat

and the movement of his breath

 

but no

it is not to be

 

Jesus is risen, but all has changed

this is not a time for old but new

this is not a time to retreat into the familiar

but a time for what is new

 

Jesus was risen, not to return to the old ways

Not to wander down dusty roads with them

Not to hunger and thirst with them,

 

not to eat with them, joke with them

Jesus was not on his way back to her and the others. He was on his way to God, and taking the whole world with him

 

The fact is that with the resurrection nothing was going to be the same

 

they could hold on to nothing past

all that had died

all that had been laid to rest

 

it was time to move on

to leave behind all that lay behind

all the pain, the fear, the hate, the ugliness

 

but also the comfortable, the know

the old pattern

the old ways

 

They had to let go of the earthly Jesus to get the risen Jesus

To get the Spirit and be lifted up by that Spirit, into resurrection living

 

When we come face to face with the risen Christ

He does not leave us in our struggles

He does not leave us in our comfort, in our old patterns

 

Instead Jesus meets us where we are and says, in effect

Wait, there is more

Wait, you haven’t seen anything yet

 

And then, through the power of the Spirit,

lifts us up out of whatever darkness entombs us. 

Lifts us up, and frees us from whatever snares us. 

Lifts us up out of our old comfortable patterns,

 

and move us forward

to whatever is next

 

whether we are ready

or not

 

 

Atoms of love

And I repeat with the same old passion, although I am gradually beginning to think that I am being tiresome, “It is the only thing we can do, Klaas, I see no alternative, each of us must turn inward and destroy in himself all that he thinks he ought to destroy in others. And remember that every atom of hate we add to this world makes it still more inhospitable.”

 

And you, Klaas, dogged old class fighter that you have always been, dismayed and astonished at the same time, say, “But that—that is nothing but Christianity!”

 

journal entry from Etty Hillesum (1914–1943),

young Jewish woman who was killed at Auschwitz

______________________________________________________________

 

I am, I am so sure, right

They are, I am so sure, wrong

 

They are people who hate other people

Imagine that

And I hate people like that!

 

They are people who are cruel and brutal

And I must attack them, vindictively

 

They must be countered

Stopped

Destroyed

 

Or so I tell myself

 

But in the quiet of Facebook Exile

Where I landed for daring to tell the truth

(or so I think)

 

It occurs to me that there is enough

Free floating “atoms of hate” in the world

And it does not help, if like an unmasked person with COVID

I spray out even more

 

This is not a time to be a skunk, and spray hostility into the air

Nor is it a time to be a turtle, and withdrawn

 

It is instead a time to journey inside, and do battle

with myself

 

to go to that deep place that defines who I really am

and allow the living water of Love

wash away all that blurs the sacred image in me

 

the reality is that if I do not allow

Sacred to repair my inner house

If I do not let Jesus wash my feet (and Oh how I hate to need help)

 

Then, when I journey outward

and seek to live in this world

I will carry all my ills with me

 

and my ills will dance with the ills of others

and what a lively dance it will be

atoms of hate

and fear

 

harsh words

harsh actions

all of us, together becoming what we hate

becoming what we fear

making the world more inhospitable

a wasteland

 

Jesus showed us the way

Humility

Allowing Sacred to wash us

So that we, refreshed, the old self gone

 

We can add to this world

love

 

This stops here!

Rachel Held Evans reminded us, in one of her blogs, that the week between Palm Sunday and Easter was a Holy mess

“Holy Week” she writes, “wasn’t perfect for the disciples. They betrayed, ran away, lied, despaired, and doubted… Holy Week wasn’t perfect for Jesus. He wept. He wondered if there was another way.  He experienced the same agony and isolation that inspired the poet David to ask, “My God, my God. Why have you forsaken me?”

 

But maybe that’s how was supposed to be.

Maybe the somber passion of Holy Week, bracketed as it is

between the riotous, victorious noise of Palm Sunday

and the victorious quiet of Easter Sunday

 

teaches us something important

about how salvation comes, about how the work of God is done

 

Perhaps the painful journey of Holy Week reminds us that the only way Jesus could get from that moment when he was declared King, to that moment, as the risen one, he became the King

 

Was to humble himself

Was to enter into the pain of the people

Was to walk into the worst the world could offer,

And carry it all,

All that pain, and fear

All that greed and lust for power

All the failure

Everything - to the cross

 

The whole strange strategy of God is summed up in Philippians 2

Paul, quoting an ancient hymn, says, that Jesus,

though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God

as something to be exploited, but emptied himself,

taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness.

And being found in human form, he humbled himself

and became obedient to the point of death–

even death on a cross…

 

Holy week is thus not a tragic story about a misunderstood man, but a triumphant story about God through Jesus becoming King of the world, not by using the violence and force of the world.

 

but by using the power of unselfish, sacrificial love.

 

That’s why he entered Jerusalem.

That’s why he went to the cross.

and gave his life, as a lamb lead to the slaughter (Isaiah 53)

 

This is a story about how God works

about how the victory of love is truly one

about how the kingdom of God is established on earth

 

and it involves a Crucified God.

 

We need this story, because, as Anne Lamontt once put it, we are Easter people,

Living in a Good Friday World

 

We live in a world that worships power

That seeks domination

That embraces affluence as merit

 

we live in a world where people use power, and dominance, and wealth

and yes, violence, to get what they want

 

we live in an oppressive world

where people struggle and are crushed,

And raise their voices

Crying

 

Lord,  Save us, now

Save us now

 

and we need to remember that the way of Jesus collides head on

with the way of Pontius Pilot, with the way of the world

 

and that salvation comes, not through the abusive and oppressive use of power

not through violence,

but through humility, and sacrifice

through generosity and compassion

through forgiveness and love

 

healing comes, newness comes

as we enter into the mess

stare hate in the face

and say “this stops here”, and refuse to participate in the hate, the racism, the violence, the abusive oppression of others

eastering

Let Him easter in us, be a dayspring to the dimness of us, be a crimson-cresseted east.”

                                                                                      Gerard Manley Hopkins

________________________________________________________________________

 

 

may God “easter” in us all

no matter who we are

 

may Sacred rise

casting light

into the darkness

 

waking us up to our

essential beauty

and our original blessing

 

stirring our souls

into earnest acceptance

of Sacred Love

 

opening us up

filling us,

until

 

as the sun spills across the earth

caressing it and revealing its beauty

 

the Sacred Presence spills forth

 

kissing  the earth

with love

Saturday

Riotous summer is long gone

brilliant yellows and red

bright greens

faded

into the muted tones of fall

and then

deeper still into the grey and brown

of winter

 

a death

 

spring lies in a tomb

of frozen earth underneath the trees

reluctantly thawing and softening

giving hope that it will yield

and life will again emerge

from dark

dirt

 

and so we wait

and wait

for the tomb to crack open

and a gentle green

piece of life

to push its way into the cool clean air

 

Holy Saturday

the vitality of one

fully sacred

fully human

is gone

brutally killed for being love and reconciliation

in a world of hate a violence

 

gone is the man

entombed in stony darkness

and yet

hearts are reluctantly thawing and softening

hoping

 

that the tomb will crack open

and love and life

will flow again

into waiting hearts

 

and so this day

we wait

we wait

 

love can

We will not be turned around

or interrupted by intimidation,

because we know our inaction and inertia

will be the inheritance of the next generation.

Our blunders become their burdens.

But one thing is certain,

If we merge mercy with might,

and might with right,

then love becomes our legacy,

and change our children's birthright.

                     Excerpt from “The Hill We Climb” by Amanda Gorman

________________________________________

 

the blunders of the fathers

the blunders of the mothers

the blunders of the Senators

the blunders of the Representatives

the blunders of the Priests, Prophets, and Pastors

 

they are not powerless

the mistakes we make through our action

or our inaction

are not without consequence

 

that is just the way this world works

the earth carries the scars of our carelessness

the air too

 

our bodies carry the excesses of our youth

when perhaps we played too hard

drank too heavily

and sought to expand our minds through drugs

 

we carry too the wounds of heart and soul

the damage of careless or casual love

the mutilations caused by fear and hate and greed

 

we try to avoid our pain

we blame others for it

we cast it into the dark depths of our souls

 

but it lies there, waiting

 

and our pain, which has made itself at home

oozes out,

 

and is visited on others

our lovers, our children

our friends and neighbors

 

and sometimes bursting forth

and exploding like bursts of gunfire in a grocery store

it does irreparable damage to others

 

it is hard to live with our pain

difficult to welcome it, and embrace it

and comfort it

and resolve it

 

and it sometimes feels as if it is too late

as if we cannot turn our lives around

our families around

our country

our world

around

 

but it is never too late

think resurrection dear one’s

think of the stark pain of the cross

and the cold finality of the tomb

 

and know what Love can do with pain

know what that Power which gives us form and life

can do with chaos and void

 

if Love can raise the sun each morning

and form the mountains

and feed the earth with water

and bring to life the animals, and birds, and fish

and you

and I

 

then Love can transform hate into love

and greed into generosity

and violence into peace

 

and Love can turn us around

Love can heal, and restore, and reconcile

 

Love can become The Way

 

our blunders are not powerless

but neither is Love

 

So let us not grow weary in doing good

Let us not grow weary of loving

for we will reap at harvest time,

if we do not give up  (Galatians 6:9)