God, we are MESSED UP

I made a mistake God

a big one

I read the news

 

Wow

God, are we messed up

We know that you are love

We know that your priority is people

all people

 

all races

all cultures

 

rich people (yes, them too)

poor people

hungry people

homeless people

gay people

lesbian people

heterosexual people

hungry people

sated people

sad people

happy people

ragged people

pampered people

we know that you want us

to have people as our priority

but when I read the news

as I read about state legislatures

congress

as I read about the behaviors of corporations

 

 I see that we are not

all about love

we are not all about people

we are about power

and wealth

more specifically it appears

our power

our wealth

 

it is not so much "us" and "them"

as it is "me"

 

O Lord

from our lust for power

and our love of money

deliver 

us

A real Prince

The authentic religious life is a matter of becoming who we already are,
and all that we truly are! Can you imagine that? Is the seed already
within you—of all that God wants you to be? Do you already know at
some level who you authentically are?
Richard Rohr

____________________________________________

Who are we?
Who am I?

I am
created in God's image

I am unique
I am special
I am gifted by the Sacred
I have the divine spark in me
I am sacred
 I participate
in all that is

I am a child of God
a child of the
ruler
of all that is

a real

prince!

How about that !!

A Prayer for Monday Morning

“Waking up this morning, I smile. Twenty-four brand new hours are before me. I vow to live fully in each moment and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.”

Thich Nhat Hanh

__________________________________

O Lord

why are you doing this to me?

I sit here on this Monday morning

listening to the sound of my furnace

yes

you heard me God!

my furnace 

running

I look out on a world 

not yet lit by the sun

and feel the crisp edge

of the morning air

and I realize that

summer

with its long 

and lazy days

 is already on the wane

I am not ready for this God

and I am not ready for the weekend to end

I am not ready for this week

which already feels long and overwhelming

but I know

O God

that this week will be

for the most part

what I make it

how I live it

let me walk through it gently God

with eyes

and mind

and heart open

may I live moment by moment

may I live each moment fully

may I

be a calm presence

and touch each person I meet

with

compassion

_____________________________

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience  - Colossians 3:12

All of Me

What you don't transform

you transmit.   

Richard Rohr

 

___________________________________

 

Lord

some days it comes to me

the shocking news

that my faith is far more about 

me

than about You

 

It is all too often a search

for myself

rather than a search for You 

(an insight from Rohr)

 

and yet

and yet

while I am search for my self

I am also running from my self

afraid of 

the dark side of my soul

that part I want no one

especially not You, to see

 

as if

 

but God

your are amazingly unimpressed with 

with my dark side

 

and You know

O God

that those hidden parts

are really the

parts

I transmitt

through my words and my actions

 

Lord

shine Your light in the dark places

help me

to accept your acceptance

help me to accept my self

my whole self

 

that I might be comfortable in my own skin

that I might be transformed

that I might

transmit

 

love

_________________________________

http://conta.cc/14almQH

Traditions

It is Chief Joseph Days 

in Wallowa County, Oregon

Native Americans

and "cowboys" alike gather

our little town of 900 becomes a 

town of thousands overnight

and for over 20 years

perhaps closer to 30

I have participated 

in the 

rituals of the event

the family rituals

the next to the last rodeo show!

north grandstands

center section

staking out space with plastic chairs for the parade

meaning

up at 5

in town by 5:30am

then down to the rodeo grounds for the 

Shriners breakfast

followed by a look at the rodeo animals

and then a hike through all the booths

set up downtown

the parade

dogs and burgers at our place

then.....

whatever is next

the lake

or just sitting in the sun talking

but times change

life changes

rituals come and go

Saturday night is now Friday

the carnival is no more

and frankly

the pancakes

and sausags

and really bad coffee aren't the 

same without brother-in-law Dan

 

nor is the walk through the booths

Dan was born here and knew everyone

and he loved to talk

it would take an hour to go a block

 

Tiger Lilly

our lovely paint mare

 is not going carry

one of the chiefs this year

 

and I have no relative in the parade

 for once

things change

things remains the same

and yet those traditions and rituals we can hang on to

are somehow comforting

and rewarding

 

 I would be deeply saddened not to have

the rituals of Chief Joseph Days

it reminds me of faith

and worship

things change

things remain the same

 

as we rush to "worship God"

in new ways

let us remember that there is great value

in some of those "old" traditions

they provide a foundation

from which we find 

the security

and freedom

to move forward into new places

and create 

new expressions

of

faith

Collecting wounds, Letting go

There are faces all around me Lord
They come before me

each day

In my office

as if by accident 

on the street

in homes visited

as one who would

however poorly, represent the love of God

Young faces, firm and flushed with health

Old faces, tired and lined

Joyful faces, expectant one

and then those other faces

Angry or sad

Hopeless and empty

Some faces Lord haunt me

They cry out

One face cries for help,

As cancer eats at the body below it

Another face cries for peace

And as story of anxiety and concern spills forth

A story shared over coffee and cookies

A face cries for forgiveness,

As it spills forth anguish

About children who are struggling

Lord

I collect those hurts and wounds

I cannot help it

They are given to me as a gift

And I am asked to carry that hurt in my heart

And at times I am weighed down by the load

Slowly pressed down by the precious burdens

With which I have been gifted.

Help me to remember lord

That those hurts are not mine to keep

or solve

Only mine to carry gently, briefly

And then

place in your healing hands

Granddaughters are grand

She isn't very tall

yet

She doesn't really use words

although she has a few

and uses sign language

(yes, her mom is teaching her sign language)

but she has a way of making her wishes

known!

but she moves

incessantly

a never stopping

bundle of energy with happy feet

she smiles 

a lot

and laughs

every inch radiating glee

with the world

and her place in it

she loves her pink glasses

and her beads

 

she just discovered kitties

and dogs

after all, that is what one does on a farm

(her great aunt's)

she has a love affair with dirt!

what can one do

when in the presence of such beauty

and energy

and joy

but just 

be

and smile?

God

(and Erin and Ryan)

did good work!

Emotional Housecleaning

O Lord
I have a plan for my day

to clean my shop
it is funny how
even though I try to be good
and keep it picked up

it still gets
like
totally messy

sawdust
pieces of wood
that stain I spilled on the floor
the stuff I just dropped on the workbench

soon my
wonderful retreat
is
a disaster

its a lot like my mind God
which
has this way of getting cluttered
so quickly
so completely

perhaps it is also a day
to do a little emotional housecleaning!

from my
own self
deliver me

O Lord!
 

Be Happy, O, and let other's be happy too!

I hear O Lord

about the birth of a child

a prince among men to be exact

People were excited

a country was excited

and happy

happy for the young royal couple, indeed,

but just happy

here was something to rejoice

and so of course Lord

the comments began to be posted

on FaceBook

in Blogs

about how stupid it was to be so happy

about how all this focus on a child was ridiculous

 

and I thought to myself

O God

Why?

 

Why is it so hard just to be happy?

and let others just be happy

full of joy

 

why can't we just let people do their

"happy dance"

why do we have to sit on the sidelines

and judge

and ridicule

 

what is it about us Lord

that we behave this way?

 

I do it too O Lord

if it is not my happiness

if it is not about me, or is not a joy I can understand

I become this 

dour sophisticate, stand on the side of the dance floor

watching others

dance

with

glee

 

Ah, there is is Lord

I really don't dance very well

I want to

I want to just let go

kick off my shoes

wave my arms

do a little jig

I want to be able to make a fool of myself

with abandon

 

out of sheer joy

 

but that is hard for me

Mennonite, Presbyterian, Kliewer

one who must always

be

strong and in control

 

I am jealous Lord

of other's happiness

 

sigh

 

This day O lord

let me embrace my own joy

and let me embrace the joy of others

and then

perhaps

 

I can dance

Lord, Help Me to See

 Kramer sits

18 years old

my neurotic cat

this morning as every morning he

sat by the door

waiting to be let in

yowling for his food

demanding his ice water (yes, he likes ice in his water)

he was petted

and fed

his water made fresh

his little sister Tess raced in

gobbled her food

and now is back outside

trying her best to turn my bird feeders

into a cat feeder

but Kramer sits

no longer the young crazy boy

who would crash into a 

room 

Seinfield like

just an old boy

looking up at me with big eyes

he has everything

except

the thing

me

and so I put down my hand

and lazily scratch his head

and give him the one thing

the only thing

that at this moment he needs

attention

love

focus!

how often Lord, do people come into my life

and I am busy doing all sorts of

things for them

when all they want

and need

is for me to be there

totally

with them

for

them

for just a moment of love and grace

Lord this day

help me to truly see the people in front of me

and at least for a moment

just 

stop

and focus

and be

their friend

_____________________________________________

  

Just then a woman who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak.  She said to herself, “If I only touch his cloak, I will be healed.” Jesus turned and saw her. “Take heart, daughter,” he said, “your faith has healed you.” And the woman was healed at that moment.  
Matthew 9 :20-22

Humanity, Shared - God Experienced

“Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It's a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.”
― Pema Chödrön,

_________________________________________

Good morning God

I thank you for this amazing day

for the mountain soaring in front of me

for the blue of the sky

for the cat chasing butterflies

and the sound of birds

singing

Today O God

people are going to listen to me

as if I have something to say

I will stand in my lovely little

church building

graced for 128 years

by 

amazing saints

people who carved their wisdom

out of the earth

and found their deep places

in the deep woods

today I will stand in front of them

and because they have 

gifted me

with the invitation to be there

I will talk

about God, and life

and death

I will talk about

things 

spiritual

I will talk

and talk

and talk

and (in the eyes of some I am sure)

talk

and sometimes

most times

all time

I wonder why I am there

standing

talking

but Lord, I am just one of the little flock

just one of the sheep

(baaa)

we are all in this together Lord

we are all  in this together

we are all saints

all sinners

we are all wounded

and we are all healers

it is in the gathering God

that the magic happens

_____________________________________

O God, bless our little outpost of the kingdom

as we gather

in Your presence

Amen!

Fiinding Joy

“Keep on knocking
'til the joy inside
opens a window
look to see who's there”

Rumi

______________________________

It is morning Lord

a not so lazy Saturday

full of chores, and trips to the "big city"

to shop

and

oh yes, the crisis phone

 

It is morning Lord

and with my morning coffee

come morning thoughts

 

sip coffee

engage mind

engage mind and ...?

 

Ah there is the rub God

 

it is the mind that gets me into trouble

for my mind has some bad habits

it worries about the future

a lot

it ruminates over past failures

a lot

 

it churns and clanks

and takes me on journeys

deep into dark places

 

someone once said

pray before you think

 

turn to the sacred space

before you let your mind take you

into the places

from which the sacred has been banished

(other wise they wouldn't exist)

 

this day Lord

I pray

that you will get my attention

 

that you will come knocking

I know I know, you told me to knock

 

but you do such an amazing job

of knocking, knocking, knocking

until

the joy inside

decides

to come out

and 

play

Where O Where is God?

Donald Miller begins his book "Blue Like Jazz" with these words:

"I once listened to and Indian on television say that God was in the wind and the water, and I wondered at how beautiful that was because it meant you could swim in Him and have Him brush your face in a breeze.

I am early in my story, but I believe it will stretch out into eternity, and in heaven I will reflect upon these early days, these days when it seemed that God was down a dirt road walking toward me.  Years ago he was a swinging speck in the distance; He is close enough now I can hear His singing.  Soon I will see the lines on his face."

_________________________________________

O God

a wise man once said

that if you are not in everything

you are in nothing at all

this day

as I sit in the vague light of early dawn

as I see the sun burning orange atop the horizon

and listen to the final hoots

of the night owl

as I watch the earth once again gain color

this day as I remember

my dear friend Sharon, facing cancer

and her loving husband 

as I think of my sister

who faces her future without her Dan

as I think of the people I will meet this day

 as I struggle 

to find something

anything to say this Sunday

that is authentic 

and helpful

I realize that

the only way to walk through life

is to realize that all is sacred

is to understand that you are the breeze against my cheek

you are the birthing sun

you are the mountain

the rivers

the owl

you are in each person who struggles

in each person who sings

and dances

you are in each person I meet

and you 

are 

in 

me

you are not distant and vague

a speck down the road

but you are present

close

Ah, so close

you are present

in even the wrinkles

on 

this 

face

AMEN

God, give me new eyes

So many people

Wide and thin

Short and tall

black, brown, white

groomed

scruffy

impaired

sober

Smiling and crying

Striding into their day, full of hope

or

wearily and tentatively edging into this day

Cautious and afraid

or

truly unprepared

to face another day

So many people

 

And with my eyes and mind I define them

Categorize them

Good or bad

Strong or weak

Well or sick

Worthwhile or

 

God help me 

may I never see anyone as worthless

For in your eyes Lord

Everyone is sacred

A beloved child

Precious and valuable

Not defined by addiction or illness

Failure or fear

color

sexuality

 

Not defined by those things we as humans use

To label or categorize and judge

God is always saying,

 

 “Here I am, I love you

and in love will do anything for you

anything

and I only ask one thing of you

that you love others as I love you

 that you see others, as I see you

that you touch all of life as if i am touching it through you

and understand

that the person in front of you

 is sacred"

Lord, let me see each person who comes into my path this day

As sacred

Valuable beyond belief

And treat them accordingly

Metta

I have been thinking a lot lately, and writing a lot lately, about the need to go inside. To go to the core of who we are, and find there the sacred presence that is there, and connect with that presence, and then, in the context of that connection, seek to find one's deepest self.  I have become convinced this is the key to spirituality, and to becoming what we were created to be.  As Paul writes, "The secret is this, Christ in us the hope of glory."  (Colossians 1)

Many years ago Elizabeth O'Conner wrote a wonderful book about getting to a place where one can live a life of meaning.  The title?  "Journey Inward, Journey Outward".  First we must go to our core!

Christopher Germer in his book about self-compassion talks about going inside while focusing on one's breathe, and using phrases to comfort one's self when one is struggling.  During one "tough patch" I decided to use a walk as a way to try and get in touch with my own center.  I have trouble sometimes practicing what I preach, and sometimes getting outside and getting into nature helps me center.

As I walked I began to develop a set of phrases that I used as a tool to get in touch with my inner self.  I walked, and breathed, and repeated the phrases.  And it made a difference.

The phrases were loosely based on the metta phrases that come out of the Buddhist tradition.  I framed them in the context of my own faith, but one could change the first two phrases in many ways, to fit many different forms of spirituality.  

At any rate, I thought I might share them.  Play with them.  See if they might have some meaning for you.

May I find the Christ within

May I find myself in Him

In the context of extravagant love

May my soul be healed

May my heart be healed

May my mind be healed

May my body be healed

May I be at ease (or peace)

Peace

As the lungs remember to breathe, even when we sleep

the spirit keeps us alive through

the dream of our will

Mark Nepo, "The Book of Awakening"

"Peace depends on whether we fight

or ride

the stream"

Mark Nepo

____________________________________________

 Sometimes Lord

life is a struggle

Sometimes, it seems as if nothing goes right

as if all is chaos

confusion

disintegration

life feels like trying

to claw one's way

up the stream

against a current 

of hate and fear and remorse

a current of failure

and regret

that is simply too powerful

and soon Lord

I am exhausted

I have tried too hard

too long

I have fought

and struggled

and I am still in

the 

same 

place

but sometimes Lord

I am moving

changing

growing

I am moving through life

watching the 

beauty as it unfolds around me

funny how those moments

are those when

I stop

and trust

that the powerful

flow of your Spirit

will carry me

to 

safety

peace