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Primitive religion is not believed, it is danced!

Arthur Darby Nock

Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God;
And only he who sees takes off his shoes;
The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries.

Elizabeth Browning



Thursday, September 12, 2024

Drinking Poison

Life appears to me too short to be spent in nursing animosity or registering wrongs.

          Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre

 

Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.

          Anne Lamott

 

Nursing a grudge only perpetuates the offender’s power over you. He continues to live in your head, reinforcing your frustration, polluting your imagination with thoughts of getting even. Don’t let him get away with that. He may or may not deserve forgiveness, but you deserve better than to waste your energy being angry at him. Letting go is the best revenge. Forgiveness is the identifying marker of the stronger party to the dispute. It is truly a favor you do yourself, not an undeserved gesture to the person who hurt you. Be kind to yourself and forgive.”

          Harold S. Kushner, Nine Essential Things I've Learned About Life

___________________________

 

It is that day

that day when we remember

the planes plowing into the towers

the destruction, chaos, and death

 

Especially death

We remember those who died

Too painfully

Too early

 

We cherish their lives and lament their lost

As we should

 

Moments like this are for learning

as they rip open our souls and our hearts

and challenge our minds

 

What can we learn about those who perpetrated such violence?

What can we learn about ourselves, and our contribution to this event?

What too can we learn from our response to this event?

 

What do we do when we return to this day?

 

It hit me hard, this day

As I watched the event on TV monitors in an airport

Preparing to board a plane to Washington DC (and then on to Azerbaijan)

A plane that never left

 

It made me angry

Pain tore through my heart as I thought of the people on those planes

And in those buildings

And thought of all the people who lost someone they loved.

 

And yes, there was hate, and fear too

 

I was forced to walk through the dark valley of death

My heart broken open, my mind in chaos, my soul aching

And Love led me

To a place where I could sit and look into still waters

And think, and feel

And see myself reflected back

 

I was changed

And emerged my heart bigger

Filled with compassion for those who were lost

But filled with lament too

For what we had done to help cause this

And even more lament for how we responded

For the damage we inflicted

 

I kept thinking about the cross, and the disciples

That was their moment of terror

When awful people brutally killed someone they loved

 

I am sure they were not just sad

But that they held in their hearts

A deep hate for those perpetrators

Those men who had driven those nails

And lift that cross into place

Who had mocked and pierced

 

I kept thinking about the cross

And the fact that the disciples did not keep returning there

They did not hang on to the cross in a negative way

They moved on

 

To the garden

They connected with a risen Lord

Who had already forgiven

And they (I think) forgave

 

The disciples were made better by the cross

Not worse

They were made more loving

More giving

More forgiving

More inclusive

 

They welcomed those very people

Them

Those Romans

Into the circle of love

 

I would like to think 9/11 made us better

But I wonder

 

As I see us nurture enmity

And see others as threatens

And listen to some demonize immigrants

As I watch us populate the world with military bases

And spend obscene amounts on the implements of war

 

And as is see us, every year, rip the scab off the deep wound

That was so terrible 

Feeling the pain, but not learning or remembering the lessons

 

The early church transformed the cross

Into something that brought healing and hope

There is something to be learned there

On this day

 

 

 


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