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Primitive religion is not believed, it is danced!

Arthur Darby Nock

Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God;
And only he who sees takes off his shoes;
The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries.

Elizabeth Browning



Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Its all about me, not!

It was an amazing morning the other day
the clouds broke
the sun filters through
dappling the forest floor with gold
a treasure scattered across the earth
It was all about me, such generosity from God!
A blessing due, I am sure

It is a miserable morning this day
gray meets gray
and heaven weeps
and all is heavy 
Why me?  What have I done to 
deserve such a
hollow day?

At times I catch myself
like a child with his hand in a cookie jar
holding fast to this 
odd and troublesome belief
that it is all about me

People seem to get better
Someone smiles
faith grows
It is all about me

A tortured mind continues to spew
its wounding thoughts
a person I cared for disappears
a note goes unanswered
the pews are empty
a suicide attempts occurs
and 
it is all about me

Its all arrogance Lord
thinking that the blessings of life are somehow linked
to my presence, my words, my work
But so is thinking that all the things that haunt me
and cause me to believe
that I personally am responsible for all that happens around me

I talk about low self esteem.  But believing it is "all my fault" is an odd sort of arrogance
 Lord, you and I both know it is not all about me
I will do some things right
I will make mistakes
I have strengths
and God, you know, I have my weaknesses

But in the end
all I can do is take one step at a time
do the best that I can do

The rest is really really out of my hands
The rest is really up to you
and grace
and love

2 comments:

  1. Thank You Steve, Perfect :)

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  2. I try to remember It is never about me when someone reacts it is normally about their stuff not me. I tell myself my part is to get suit up do the next right thing and leave the results to God. With that there is no room for resentments or pride.

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