Dare to Believe

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It’s anxiety that we feel, yes, and a tender, sweet, piercing sadness, not just for ourselves, but also for everyone and everything everywhere, all at once… We feel this doom because we are awake, at least partially awake.  The more we wake up, the worse we feel.  It’s so tempting to fall back to sleep.

 

No wonder certain politicians hate the idea of being ‘woke.”  It’s because of our common sense and uncommon sensitivity that we feel this way.  It’s our moral seriousness, our commitment to keep our eyes open, even through tears.

          Brian McLaren  (Life After Doom)

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I cannot help it

I am painfully awake

 

There is a certain peace that comes with sleep

A blissfulness that comes from

Closing one’s eyes

And dreaming sweet dreams

 

Of justice and peace

Of equity and equality

 

I long for that peaceful kingdom

Where there are no enemies

Where no one hurts or destroys

And the earth is full of love

 

Where we are soaked in kindness and mercy

 

But I cannot sleep

My eyes are open, and what I have seen

Cannot be unseen

 

And my heart hurts

Not just for those marginalized and minimized

Not just for those crushed by injustice

Treated like objects

Denied a voice

 

But for those who are not awake

Who do not see

 

Whose ears are filled with lies

Whose minds and hearts are closed

 

Who in their own

Anxiety and fear choose answers

That do not work

 

Choose dominion and coercion

Choose judgment and retribution

Choose hate and violence

 

Those who in their desire to escape

Their own spiritual hunger

Scratch and claw their way toward wealth

 

And so, the tears come

For it feels too big

Too big to solve

Irredeemable

 

Whether I like it or not

I must “dance with doom” (McLaren)

 

It is a dance that changes me

It can make me hard, and better

Angry and hateful

 

Or, if I dare believe

Dare believe that the Kingdom will come

That love will ultimately win

That Sacred has not abandoned us (although we have ignored Sacred)

 

It can make me

Kinder, stronger, more compassionate

 

It can strengthen my resolve

To wake up

Stand up

And walk through each day

Refusing to let Doom win

Choosing to walk with eyes wide open

(though filled with tears)

 

With a mind and a heart

And with hands

Wide open too