I can only believe

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It haunts me

Lingering in my mind

Like the foul stench of something dead that I cannot find

 

It sticks to my clothes

My mind, my heart

And I cannot wash it away

 

With good thoughts

Or good theology

 

It is the smell of hate, fear, resentment,

And vindictiveness

 

My four horsemen of the apocalypse

 

We live in a world dominated by malefaction

These profane powers eat away

At the fabric of decency like a cancer

 

Until people believe the lies

Support the unsupportable

Abandon not just truth but compassion

Justice

Equity

 

And all that is love and light

Seems overwhelmed

 

Powerless

 

Ezekiel like I am looking out on a valley of dry bones

As 30% of those around me believe a proven lie

And people of “faith” worship a vile person

Who, fists clenched, face and voice distorted

Ridicules, dehumanizes, and incites

 

We are stripped clean of wisdom and decency

 

Can these bones live?

Can these bones live?

 

I have to believe

I do believe

Lord, help my unbelief

 

This is what faith is about

Faith in a God of creativity and love

A God of justice and compassion

 

A God who cares

 

I do not know how

I do not know when

I only know

 

That this God is turn to

This God who is as close as my breath

This God who came, and lived among us

Paradoxically

Three and one

Human divine

Power and humility

 

This God can and will

Bring these bones to life

 

There has been evil before

There will always be evil

Foul souls will always seek and sometimes gain power

Ascendence

 

But always God is present

Working

Working through weakness and humility

Through kindness and grace

Working, working, working

 

Until in the driest, most lifeless moments

there is “a noise, a rattling sound,

and the bones come together, bone to bone…

and tendons and flesh appear on them and skin covers them,

and the breath of God

breathes life

 

and love wins

in ways small, ways large

ways obvious, ways hidden

 

I do not know what happens

To those people of the lie

To those who hate and destroy

And wallow in resentment and retribution

 

I cannot (yet) wish them well

But I cannot wish the hell

 

I can only hope for transformation

For restoration

For the light to shine in the darkness

 

I can only believe