Broken down, broken open

Sometimes

I feel

like a man of sorrows

well too acquainted with grief

I think of my parents

gone way to soon, my tall strong dad with his sense of humor

my short active mother

that force of nature who just made things happen

and I sorrow over their absence

the fact that they never got to meet

smiling, laughing Mara

their great granddaughter

I think of friends

struggling with cancer

or hurt

I think of people hurt

by my words

or my actioins

I see their faces

sometimes they wake me up at night

and I am drenched with regrets

I think of mistakes made

things done

or left undone

and my heart breaks

and I suffer

and yet I know 

that all God's children

even that child

the one who came

have some measure of sorrow

 

and somtimes

when broken down with sorrow

especially when that sorrow is shared

I find myself broken open

 

to new levels of love

and compassion

and connection

 

ah love

the precious ointment 

that slowly

and gently heals our hearts

 

and enables our suffering

to ever so slowly

and gradually

emerge

as healing

and

 

grace