the lie in the middle

What does “believe” mean?  There is a “lie” in the middle of it, that’s the first thing.  Believe.  My Dictionary of Etymology notes that a particular Germanic rootword contributing to believe means “to make palatable to oneself”.  To be believe and to feel believed, these are deeper forms of the same thing.  Curiously the entry for “belittle” is what follows the entry for believe in my etymological dictionary.    When [our story] is not believed, then things are exhausting

                               Padraig O’Tauma

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No wonder we are exhausted

We spend so much time trying to figure out what we believe

What our “truth” is

 

And there are so many “truths’ out there

Truths about this world

Truths about this virus

Truths about ourselves

 

And we try to make sense of it all

We create a belief system

Something we can hang on to, something that works, for us

 

There really is truth in what we believe

but honestly, we should probably pay attention

to the lie in the center

 

for we have constructed our belief

out of all the fragments of life that have come our way

from the tomes of belief, like the Bible

from FOX news, and MSNBC, and NPR

 

we have contrasted our belief out of our own life experiences

out of what we have done, and what has been done to us

out of what we have been taught

 

and we have woven all of this together into a covering, in which we wrap ourselves

a cloak which shelters us

 

there is truth there

there are, truly, flecks of the Sacred sprinkled in

objective realities and truths that will not change

even in this post fact world

 

God is love

kindness is more powerful that cruelty

forgiveness frees

 

but in the center is the lie

as we seek comfort, and in that search try to make reality “palatable”

comfortable, and safe

we create our own truth, all of us

 

I do! 

I create my own reality, my own version of how things work

even my own version of God

and its palatable, it fits what I want to believe

 

and thus the lie

 

which means, if it means nothing else

that I must constantly bathe myself in uncertainty and humility

in that abrasive truth that I might be wrong

 

because if I do not, then when I encounter others

whose beliefs (and lies) are different from mine

my response is belittlement

it is minimization and marginalization of the other

 

and it is exhausting

pushing other people down, out, away

far more exhausting than lifting them up

than welcoming, accepting, loving

 

only One holds the truth

and somehow I have to let go of those things I believe

those things I hold on to so tightly

 

and let that One

create holy uncertainty

which is the certainty, that the one thing I can hold fast to

the one truth I can live by

is Love

 

When I say “I believe” may there be few specifics!

For the more specifics the more the lie

 

May there simply be the assertion

That God is Love

That Love is

That Love lives in each one of us

And that no matter what we do, it must be done in love

 

What do I believe about Covid-19?

I have my beliefs!

But no matter what they are, I have to respond to the pandemic

With love

 

No matter what truth I have grasped for myself, no matter how

I have shaped reality to make it palatable to myself

Deadly, not deadly

Truth or hoax

 

If I believe in the One, in Love

then I distance, no matter what!

I wear a mask, no matter what!

 

If I know there is a lie (not intentional to be sure) in the middle of my beliefs

and can allow for uncertainty, and in that uncertainty, allow room for love

and acceptance, and kindness

 

then I will love not belittle

and that

is a good thing!

 

“I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”  (Ephesians 4:1,2)