the bully brain

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,

Your thoughts become your words,

Your words become your actions,

Your actions become your habits,

Your habits become your values,

Your values become your destiny.”

Gandhi

_____________________________

Some say that our beliefs

Determine how we interpret life

Our self talk, our metal scripts, our life commandments

All become the lens through which we see life, and others

Ganhdi suggested that our thoughts

Determine our words and our actions

And ultimately our patterns…

I would not disagree

And yet

I will not agree

This is indeed the way it can be

We can listen to our thoughts

And allow our thoughts to shape us and direct us

The brain can in fact be a bully

And create all kinds of pain

And dysfunction

But I believe that we have a choice

Our choice is to set our values,

Understand our values

Verbalize our values

And then live toward them

Rather than the other way around

I would say

We pick what is important to us

Who is important to us

And then we choose to live toward those values

Values determine actions

Actions emerge from the way we talk to ourselves

From the way we think

And the fact is we can “step away from the brain”

We can realize that so much of what holds us back

Is only in our head

It is our thoughts, our patterns, our habits, that are the enemy

That keep us stuck

Or in a painful, hopeless loop

And we can choose not to let our thoughts make us sick

We can choose to notice them,

And let them go

And do what we care about

Anyway

Right now it is 7pm

The rain is falling

The temperature is dropping

The snow is coming

The week ahead is full

My bully brain says

“life sucks”

“why bother”

“you aren’t doing anything well”

“Go to Bed, NOW!”

Ok, that last thought may not be that bad an idea

But I don’t have to listen to my bully brain

I can, because I value helping others

Step away from the brain

Take a few deep breaths

And then move toward what I value

Nope, not the Super bowl

But there is a book with my name on it

There are things to learn

My values

My choice

My life