The heart has reasons

“The heart has its reasons which reason knows not.”

                                         Blaise Pascal

“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.”

                                         Mahatma Gandhi (attributed to)

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What is on my heart today?

Not my brain

which chatters without ceasing

like a demented monkey

but my heart

if I stay in my head I will be overcome

with thoughts about the stock market

and my shrinking retirement accounts

if I stay in my head I will spend my day

analyzing polls

trying to figure out which wrinkled old white guy

is going to sit

in the seat of power

In my head are thoughts about tasks mundane

trips to the store

bills to be paid

emails to be send

but what do I find

if I still my mind

breath in

breath out

breath in

breath out

ah

they are much different

these things that tug at my heart

they have faces

I see my old friend

now in a care center

fearful that her friends will not be allowed to visit (Covid-19)

I see an anxious father

hoping that his daughter’s transplanted kidney

continues to work well

I see a LGBTQI friend

whose face carries her fears

about lost protections

and increased hostility

I see the single mother

scrambling to make ends meet

as yet another support program is cut

I see the tired, resigned face of the immigrant

The empty eyes of a young black person

The twisted face of one governed by hate and prejudice

I also see my children

And my grandchildren

And friends I care deeply about

And I am glad, sometimes

And sad

Joyful, and concerned

At the heart level

There are only people

That is what I carry there

Those I love

Those for whom the Sacred has given me

Empathy, and compassion

So much of what I worry about this day

Does not

In the end

Count for much (in the final equation)

But those things that are on my heart

Those people

Those precious souls

They are what matters

They are what count

And so

I pray