Primitive religion is not believed, it is danced!

Arthur Darby Nock

Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God;
And only he who sees takes off his shoes;
The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries.

Elizabeth Browning

Friday, February 26, 2016

Filling the Cup

“There is an inmost center in us all, where truth abides in fullness;....and, to know, rather consists in opening out a way where the imprisoned splendor may escape, then in effecting entry for a light supposed to be without.”
― Robert Browning

I have always suspected
that my soul has a slow leak

for I have struggled, for as long as I can remember
feeling a profound degree of hollowness
as if somehow I was emptied out

a cracked vessel

there is a certain desperation that comes
from being in such a place

it is not that I have not believed in my giftedness
for gifts I have
it is merely a sense that everything


is constantly slipping away
leaving me gasping for respect, and value, and love
(if you have not been in this place, you may not be able to understand)

and so most of my life
has been spent, trying to fill my soul
with achievement, knowledge, affection

and I have done wonderful things
and I have done horrible things

seeking to fill that void

I have sought relief through work
and relationships
through activity and creativity

I have abused myself
and tried to use others (how does one apologize to all those one has hurt in the process?)
seeking to fill the inner cup

and still the emptiness has returned

now I sit on the edge of forever
watching the sun rise
and the glint of the golden sun on mountain snow

one who is no longer young

knowing this one thing
(I have been a slow learner)

that one can only fill the cup
from the inside....

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